Persona 4 Ultimate
by CplGunshow
Summary: A mysterious world in which Yu Narukami has a secret wish that he wants to come true.
1. Chapter 1: The Bearginning

(An: Hi everyone, this is my first time writing a fan fiction! I just love Persona 4 (the video game AND the animation xD) and I wanted the world to continue! I hope you all enjoy the wacky adventures of the investigation team! =3 )

Chapter 1: The Bearginning

Yu Narukami entered the room, Chee was there waiting for him. "Narukami-sama" Said Chee, he was really happy to be in his room with him, his erection was starting to grow. Narukami looked at him with a look of intent like he was ready to fuck the sweaty beef bowl challenge. Chee was nervous, he had never seen another mans kung fu penis before and this was going to be his first time seeing one before that wasn't his own.

He sat down on the bed and began to unbutton his pants. His floppy donger was now not floppy, but ready to be used as a police baton. Narukami sat down at his weird ass little coffee table where he built megamin power ranger robots and planned how he was going to fuck the nurse at the hospital. Chee was used to him not speaking, because he is a silent protagonist and doesn't speak. Narukami started to write something on a bit of paper.

"Narukami-sama?" asked Chee, who didn't want to look into his fat face. He handed him the piece of paper he had been writing on. Chee took the paper with intent, as if it was someone handing him some food from the trash, if it hadn't of been written on by his love, he would of eaten it there and then.

Chee began to open the paper, his erection throbbing at the thought of the Secrets of the piece of paper. the paper was paper and therefore easy to open, however, Chee had a hard time as his chubby fingers where just too lardy to get a good grip. Chee finally managed to open the paper.

It was a detailed image of an old man being sexually assaulted by a young girl while he was cooking, Chee didn't know how to take this, did Narukami secretly wish to be 72 years old?

Narukami began to cry at his desk, violently punching his gundam figurines that he had bought for cheap at Junes, the convenience store that his gay lover owned. He then violently started searching the web for memes, such as pepe and began to open tabs to old man porn websites.

Chee knew what this meant.

Narukami was still sobbing when Chee approached him, his erection was now an unerection (lol) and was completely floppy. "It's ok, Narukami-san I know what we have to do"

To be continued.


	2. Chapter 2: Bearly The Bearginning

Chapter 2: Bearly the beggining

Narukami and Chee walked down the stairs from his bedroom into the main room of the building. It was a Japanese style house and they have shit building design which meant that everything that wasn't Narukami's bedroom was here. Nanako was sitting infront of the TV like usual, puffing in from her Teddie bong and watching MLG TV (AN: Teddie has been the mascot for shen meganpi tentsee for 30 years! Wow!). "'Ite m8" said the 4 year old "How's tricks?", she was fully aware that Narukami couldn't talk because he was a silent protagonist and couldn't talk but she often fucked with him like this because he couldn't talk. Nanako took in a big pull from her bong and stared directly into Narukami's eyes saying "Look m8, if you touch my shit in the fridge again, I will literally kick the fuck out of you until you are dead" said Nanako to Narukami. Narukami was already a pissing ball of emotions from revealing that he wanted to be a 72 year old man who fucks young girls, so he carried on silently sobbing because he's a silent protagonist and cannot talk.

Just as Narukami and Chee were about to leave the house the door slammed open and what looked like a tree on legs and a mumbling midget walked in, it was Dojima and Adachi. Dojima was Nanako's father and the uncle of Narukami, years ago, his wife and Nanako were in a car accident together in which their car was eaten by a bear, his wife died but Nanako survived. Dojima however was convinced they both died that day and thinks that Nanako is a ghost, which is why he lets her blaze up in the front room because ghosts do not have brains and therefore cannot suffer the adverse effects of marijuwaynee (AN: A drug that makes you extremely drunk). Adachi was Dojima's partner, he looked and sounded like Kermit the frog with an extra fist up his asshole, he is not important to the plot in anyway though so you should probably ignore him. "Woah, hey guys!" said Adachi, dragging in the drunk and sobbing Dojima who was an alcoholic and liked to screw prostitutes, "I didn't know you'd be here! Wan't to order some food?" "Fuck off you nonce case" replied Nanako. Chee wanted to get out of this shitty house and quickly dragged Narukami to the front door "Thanks for having me everyone, but me and Narukami are going to out for a while" there was no time for Narukami to change his pissed pants now that his family were all home so they left straight away.

Chee fireman carried Narukami down the street with his legs beause they were really strong and he used them to kick shadows "Let's go and get Yosuke, he'll know how to turn you into a 72 year old". Yosuke used to be Narukami's gay lover, but due to an argument over what skin colour Michael Jackson actually was they split up, which seemed crazy to Narukami, because he literally can't talk because he's a silent protagonist. Yosuke still wanted the D though, so they stayed friends for the sake of my story actually progressing. Chee and Narukami arrived at Junes, the store were Yosuke works part time and harrases underage girls, Yosuke was outside trying to convince some 12 year olds to hang out with him if he bought them smirnoff ice with his fake ID, the girls ran away screaming and Yosuke looked sad. "Hey dudes!" said Yosuke noticing the fat dude and the pile of shit he was carrying with his legs"what are you doing here so late?". "We have a major problem, Narukami wouldn't fuck me because he want's to be a 72 year old man" replied Chee, tears rolling down his face because he really wanted to screw the tiny Shinji Ikari cosplayer, "You have to help us Yosuke!". Yosuke thought about this for a while, rubbing his fingers on his chin in a thinking way that made his brain visions more clearer and then he snapped his fingers "I got it!" he yelled in an overly enthusiastic way. Yosuke explained that there is a show called the midnight channel and if you watch it your wishes will come true. Chee's erection slightly grew after hearing this as he thought of how he could use it to make Narukami his bitch. The group decided to try watching the midnight channel together, Narukami did not want to watch the midnight channel, but he is a silent protagonist and cannot talk so the others ignored him.

To be continued...


	3. Chapter 3: A Different Bearniverse

Chapter 3: A different Bearniverse

Narukami, Chee and Yosuke were sat infront of a large TV in Junes waiting for the clock to strike midnight. Yosuke often snuck down here so that he could watch porn in HD, but he didn't realise that the whole store had CCTV that monitored the shop overnight, his dad saw him jacking it often but felt the conversation was too awkward to talk about. Yosuke turned to his friends and stated "It's almost midnight guys, I hope you all have a wish ready". Narukami knew what he really wanted, but he had a bad feeling about what would happen. He would often lay awake at night and considering the implications of fucking with the Universe, things like the butterfly effect, where if you make love to a butterfly a dinosour's appendix would burst years later.

The clock struck midnight and the 3 friends stared into the static on the TV. "Ah Jeez" Yosuke complained "we should of known it was a load of shit". Just as it seemed like all hope was lost, the static turned into a swirly thing like hypnotists use to make people fall asleep. Chee backed away in terror "W-what is happening!" Narukami also backed away, but couldn't express the fear he was feeling, because he was a silent protagonist. Soon the TV started making sucky noises like Noo noo from the teletubbies, the friends found themselves being sucked towards the TV! Yosuke was hanging on for dear life "Oh God, I don't want to die!" he loudly complained once again. Narukami was the first to get sucked up, followed by Yosuke and Chee. Soon they were completely gone and for the purpouse of plot holes lets pretend that Yosukes dad has decided to no longer watch the CCTV at night.

Narukami opened his eyes, he had awoken in a strange world. Everything was a weird shade of yellow, some would call it golden, like the name of the game, Persona 4 golden. An annoying mascot like voice rang through his skull like a robot who had been abandoned by God screaming at a baby who was also screaming. "HELLO THERE FRIENDS, WHO MIGHT YOU BE!?" screamed the annoying high pitched thing. Narukami focused his vision on where the voice was coming from and there he saw an animal looking thing, it looked a bit like... a fox. "MY NAME IS MILES TAILS PROWLER" screamed the voice coming out of the tiny fox thing. Chee looked over to Narukami and said "I think this shit head is going to be an annoying companion for the rest of our lives". Yosuke started freaking out, he had never seen a talking fox before, even in all of the weird yiffy porno who would watch in HD while his dad cried at his sons weird perversions. Yosuke pointed at the fox thing accusingly "H-how the hell can you talk!", an incredible question that would solve all these myseries. "WELL, I'VE ALWAYS BEEN ABLE TO TALK, ME AND MY FRIEND SONIC WOULD ALWAYS HAVE CONVERSATIONS WITH EACH OTHER ABOUT CHILLI DOGS". Yosuke didn't know what the hell a Sonic was and he didn't care, just as he was about to complain at the fox some more something terrible came into view. Narukami and Chee saw it too, Chee panicked and yelled "Monster!".

A Giant eye ball thing that is apparently a shadow but doesn't really look much like my shadow or my friend Dave's shadow appeared and was heading straight at the super friends! While Chee and Yosuke screamed and panicked and Yosuke really needed to do a wee wee Narukami started to contemplate, did his wish to be an old man never reach the ears of God? When all else seemed lost IT happened. "HERMITO PURUPLE!", a voice they didn't recognise but sounded manly and a lot like the best JoJo rang out. An old man flew in weilding a camera wish he crushed with his bare hands. A giant purple tentacle thing flew out of no where and blew up the eye ball shadow that doesn't look like mine or my friends shadow. The super best friends stared in disbelief at what they had just seen, the old man turned to them and gave them a thumbs up.

To be continued...


	4. Chapter 4: The Adbearture begins!

AN: Hi everyone! Thanks for sticking with me despite how little I release things, I've been playing so much Persona Q! I think it's my favourite Persona game so far =3

Chapter 4: The Adbearnture Begins!

Narukami opened his eyes. Who was that old man? What was that purple tentacle? Where was he? Narukami realised he must have passed out from the shock of what had just happened. A talking fox, giant eyeballs, it was all too much for him to handle! He began to take in his surroundings, a super cool piano track was playing and the room he found himself in was a weird shade of blue. Narukami sat up and found he was in a completely different place he was just in. it felt like, a limo? He also noticed that there were three figures he didn't recognise staring at him. "Weeeeeelcome, to the veeeelveeeet room!" said a peadophelic voice from the table. Narukami approached the table and sat down, in front of him was a piece of velvet cake, as well as this the man in front of him looked odd. He wore a black suit and had a fully erect penis for a nose with two testicles hanging underneath, his eyes were wide, incredibly wide, so wide that it looked like he had just seen his own conception and it was during an orgy in which his mother was the only female. The female next to penis man was a totally smoking milf, but she looked like she might be a bit of a cunt. Speaking of cunts, there was also some emo looking fuck in the room also, she looked like she had fell into a washing machine and just stuck with whatever clothes landed on her.

The penis man started to speak. "Hello there, you are a traveller on a journey to find the truth, like in that song called reach out to the truth. I am penis man, I will help you on this Journey." Narukami was confused as all hell but he couldn't voice this because he was a silent protagonist. The smoking milf chimed in: "You have the power of the wild card, you can summon any stand you think of, which is really fucking cool and I will actually have sex with you if you do a bunch of fusion shit for me" (AN: I know she doesn't actually fuck Narukami in the game, but I think she should of). Penis man pointed his erect cock nose at Narukmai "All will become clear soon, but you should probably go back to reality first" Narukamis vision went white, until he segwayed back to where chapter 3 ended.

Narukami woke to Chee franticly shaking him "Oh thank God, you're alive! When you passed out and shit yourself I thought you were a goner!" Narukami realised, that he had indeed now made poo poo in his trousers. Yosuke decided to fill him in on what had happened. "Dude you would not believe it! This old guy here is called Joseph Josestar, and he is a way cooler protagonist than you!" (AN: Good luck with pronunciation here Karl) The old man smiled at the terrified grey haired teenager "Hai, sou desu yo!" Yosuke cut back in "Joseph is an Englishman who moved to America and then came on a quest to Japan! That's why he can only speak Japanese!" luckily, all of the characters could understand Japanese as it was the superior language and not shitty dubs like in dangan ronpa. Yosuke went on to explain to Narukami that Joseph told them about how they all had these powers called personas and that they could use them to fight evil. Joseph needed their help to find and kill a sexy ass vampire called Dio Brando "OH NO!" Joseph screamed confirmingly. Tails walked over to the gang "HEY NEW FRIENDS, IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO FUCK OFF OUT OF HERE SO THAT THE AUTHOR CAN SPEED THE STORY ALONG AND GET ONTO ANOTHER CHAPTER!" Everyone noded in agreement and Chee carried Narukami back through the TV back into the real world. The gang parted ways and decided to meet up after school the next day to discuss everything.

To be continued...


	5. Chapter 5:AfoximatelyTimeToBeginTheQuest

Chapter 5: Afoximately time to begin the quest!

The next day after school, Narukami, Chee, Yosuke and Joseph Joestar met up outside of their classroom. Joseph was a master of disguise and had fit into the class as a female exchange student, all the school boys commented on how great he looked. Yosuke spoke up first "Ok guys, if we're gonna help Joseph with his quest to kill Dio then I think we may need a bigger team first" the gang all thought to themselves, who would be the best person to add? Chee knew who "Oh I know!" she said, knowingly, "Why don't we ask Yukiko?" Yukiko was a seriously good looking grill who all the boys wanted to fuck, even more than Joseph even though they all talked in class about how they wanted to bang him because he was disguised as a grill so they thought he was a grill. Yukiko was friends with Chee, however she didn't come out as much as Yosuke to hang out because she had to help her mum run the brothel she owns, where Yukiko works as a prostitute (AN: That means she has sex for money). Joseph cheered "VERY NICEU CHEE-CHAN!" The gang decided to recruit Yukiko, hooray!

They headed straight to Yukikos mum's brothel to speak to Yukiko, who was upstairs in her underwear shaking after having a pretty bad experience after smoking meth. "H-h-hey guys" she spurted out "what's up? The sky!?" Yukiko then burst out in an annoying laugh, which she normally did because she was addicted to drugs and that had fried her brain more than the flames of hell would fry an egg in a frying pan. Chee explained to Yukiko that they needed her help to defeat Dio, which she agreed to straight away, probably because she may have still been high as fuck. After they had explained everything, Yosuke invited the group back to Junes at night so they could sneak into the TV world.

Narukami returned home, Nanako was watching blue's clues. "Aight big bro" she said to Narukami as he came through the front door "You smell a lot less like piss today init, the fuck's that all about?" Narukami avoided eye contact with her, he thought she was a bit of a cunt. Just then the front door opened and Adachi came in "Woah, hey guys!" he said (AN: Adachi isn't an important character in Persona 4, so you should carry on not paying much attention to him). "Did you hear the news? Yukiko Amagi has gone missing!" Nanako chimed in "That slut is a fuckin' waste of money, I could have a better shag with a shitty junes plastic bag". Narukami freaked out, he had only spoken to her that day! He quickly sprinted past Adachi who doesn't matter that much to the story and ran to Junes.

Later, in the TV world. "WOAH HEY GUYS I AM SOO GLAD YOU CAME BACK!" Yelled Tails enthusiastically, he was a bit of an annoying prick, but Narukami didn't mind him that much. Chee was frantically jumping around and doing things that made her look panicked "We have to save Yukiko! She's the only person I would have sex with who isn't Narukami!" Yosuke tried to hide the fact that this saddened him by looking around and avoiding eye contact, everyone became quickly aware of how thirsty he was though. Chee pointed at tails "Tails! Do you have some kind of power to help us find her!?" Tails thought to himself and then piped up "NOPE, I AM COMPLEEEEETELY USELESS!" he proclaimed. Joseph then jumped in "ORE WA HELPERINO DESU!" He then smashed a camera against Yosukes head, knocking him out cold. The camera then printed a picture of what looked like a castle. Tails looked like a 3 year old who had just convinced his mum to buy him a beyblade "I KNOW WHERE THAT IS!" shouted the dickhead fox "FOLLOW ME!" Tails used his flying tails to fly with his tails upwards and away, the gang followed closely behind but they could not fly, Joseph could use his Hermit Purple like spider man webs though that was pretty cool.


	6. Chapter 6: A Castle With A Foxy Princess

Chapter 6: A castle with a foxy princess 

The persona team arrived at a familiar looking castle, it was definitely the one from Josephs picture. Yosuke had regained conciousness on the way luckily and was ready to battle. Narukami lead the charge, the team ran into the front of the castle. Yosuke whispered "Ok guys, stay alert, we don't know what we might run into in here" Narukami would of told the team that himself seeing as he is the leader, but he can't because he is a silent protagonist. Suddenly, the wall next to them collapsed! A weird hammer looking thing flew out of the darkness and smashed into Josephs leg, the force was so hard it caused it to blow up and fly off. "OHHHH NOOOOOO!" Yelled Joseph as his leg shot out blood everywhere, he retaliated by shooting his rocket hand into the darkness, but unfortunately it looked like it missed it's target.

Narukami instinctively pissed himself as Yosuke screamed next to him, jumping up and down and pointing at the old legless man on the floor who was rolling around in pain. Chee stepped in "Persona!" he yelled, summoning his persona who I can't remember the name of right now. Chee's persona launched a flurry of kicks at the darkness, a loud clank was heard! Suddenly a shadowy figure dashed upwards and landed in front of them. The figure didn't look human, it was black and wearing some kind of shield on it's face, whatever it was, it looked like a shit. Yosuke stopped pointing at the dying old man and pointed at the shit instead "What the hell is that! It looks like a shit!" The shit stepped forward and it's mask raised upwards. "I am not a shit, I am Metis, a war robot sent from the future to kill that man right there, Narukami Yu" like a penis ejaculating, she shot at Narukami who was too busy trying to get his trousers back up, as the dampness of his piss had caused them to fall down. Yosuke jumped out in attack mode "Persona!" he yelled, summoning his disco ninja frog. Yosuke launched a wind attack that caught the shit just in time, launching her backwards into a wall. The shit stood up "Ahh, I see you are persona users as well" she stated with an evil smirk, "but can your personas stand up against, BULLETS!?" suddenly a machine gun erupted from her chest "I am a nazi from the planet Hitler! And I will complete my missions! With German technology!" Suddenly a hail of bullets shot out of her chest, Chee grabbed Narukami and jumped behind cover, Yosuke used his wind abilities to launch him and the dying Joseph Joestar behind a wall too. Tails was stuck in the middle "OH NO!" yelled the prickish fox in a high pitched squeal as literally like 500 bullets tore through him like that scene in robo cop. By the time Metis had stopped firing, Tails was no longer recognisable, but one thing was recognisable, the fact that Tails was fucking dead.

Chee burst into tears "Tails!" she shouted "Tails are you ok!?" of course, Chee was being a stupid bitch here because clearly Tails was not ok, he looked like fox porridge. "You monster!" she yelled pointed at Metis, who was now laughing manically and pulling faces from hentai when a 2D waifu is really enjoying sex. Chee looked at Narukami "Narukami, you have to stop being such a wuss! We need you to use your power!" Narukami knew that this was true, he stood up all cool like and walked out in front of Metis, who was now out of ammo. Narukami thought to himself, this if for Tails! Which he would of said but he couldn't because he was a silent protagonist. Crushing a card in his hand, he summoned his persona, Izunagi! Izunagi shot a lightning bolt at Metis, which caught her because it was lightning fast. "I-Impossible!" yelled Metis, who was being electrocuted "The future nazi bots said you were a pissing pile of shit!" Narukami ran at Metis with his sword drawn and slashed at her, but she used a jet stored in her asshole to shoot upwards and avoid the shot! "You are still no match for me!" She yelled, turning her ass skyward to launch herself at Narukami "This is my final attack!" Metis brought her pole down with her, ready to crush Narukami. Yosuke yelled out to Narukami "Narukami, look out!" However, Narukami was ready with a trick. He pulled out his Yu-gi-oh cards and trusted in the heart of the cards, he drew a card and crushed it instantly, not looking at what it was. A Giant hole appeared in the floor, a trap hole! Metis was moving too fast to stop! Narukami quickly rolled out the way and The shit robot smashed into the hole at a super fast speed, causing her to instantly explode. "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" yelled the plot device as she burned to a crisp.

The group quickly ran to Tails. Yosuke leant down beside him "Tails, I didn't know you but I feel like you would of become my annoying room mate if I did" There was a depressing aura in the area. The group did not realise though that joseph had drawn some from of glyph around them using the blood that was gushing out of his leg. "STANDO BACKU!" Yelled Joseph to narukami and Chee, however he pointed at Yosuke "YOSUKE CHAN, HELP PREASE DESU!" Yosuke ran over to Joseph and copied what he was doing. Joseph placed his remaining hand on the outside of the glyph he had drawn and an incredible power blast out of the middle, where the Tails porridge was. "TAILSU, PREASU REVIVEU DESU!" Yelled Joseph. However. Something went incredible wrong. Josephs arm in which his robot arm should be attached suddenly burned up and faded away "HORI SHIIIIIT!" yelled Joseph as his arm faded off into existence. Yosuke was screaming horribly, it sounded like he was taking a super big poo and it was tearing his bum hole apart, suddenly, Yosuke disappeared and only his clothes remained. Joseph realised what had happened, he couldn't use his powers to bring back someone from the dead, but it was too late, Yosuke was gone. "OH MAH GOD!" he yelled, crawling over to an armoured suit laying on the ground "YOSUKE! NO! PREASU! GIB HIM BACK! HE'SU ALL I HAVE!" Joseph drew a symbol on the inside of the armoured suit with his blood. He then laid there, with his missing arm and leg, regretting limitedly that he tried to save that annoying fox thing.

Soon, the powerful noises and flashy lights calmed down and everything was silent. Except, for the suit of armour. Joseph, Narukami and Chee stared in disbelief as the armour stood up by itself. The walking suit of armour looked at the gang and then at itself "...Why, am I a suit of armour!?"

To be continued...


End file.
